The Children's Program

Shanni

When Shanni and her children arrived at My Sister's Place, seven-year old Taneka and two-year old Anthony were quiet and withdrawn, slow to smile or laugh, and too timid to be enticed by our toys or stray far from their mom. However, as the weeks passed and they experienced the comfort and relief of safety, their layers of distrust and fear slowly but steadily dissolved. Anthony began to talk and laugh, to demand to be picked-up and held, and to play with every toy and explore every corner he could find. Taneka began to share her feelings openly, to feel pride and confidence in her work, and to learn to have fun and be a kid. Now, Shanni rejoices every time she hears the sounds of childhood in her home — playful giggling, childish bickering, excited yelling, soft snoring — for through these sounds, she realizes her children are finally free to be children and are no longer thwarted by turmoil and fear. Although Shanni, Taneka, and Anthony still face many challenges, they are confident and excited, for they have discovered within themselves the strength and the courage to succeed.

Our goal at My Sister's Place is to create an environment where children feel safe to freely express their feelings, explore their world, and develop their sense of self. In our vital Children's Program, children get help with the issues that arise from living in a family where there has been abuse. Like their abused mothers, children who live in homes devastated by domestic violence experience emotional, psychological, and physical trauma. Unfortunately, because these children have learned to survive by staying silent and hidden, by being invisible, it is difficult for them to reach out for help and to make their needs seen and heard. With the aid of talented volunteers and staff, My Sister's Place provides recreational and educational activities where children, educational, can express themselves; we teach them to be kids and have fun. By providing our children with individual attention and patience, love, and understanding, our children learn self- respect, confidence and new peaceful ways of relating with their family and their peers.

Statistics:

Approximately 70% of the men who abuse their female partners also abuse their children. (Wilson, 1997)
Reports by battered mothers indicate that 87% of children witness the abuse. (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence Fact Sheet, 1993).
Sexually abused boys have an increased risk of becoming pedophiles if they are exposed to violence at home. (Fort Myers News-Press, 08/18/98)
Abused children are much more likely to have certain health problems as adults, such as addiction, obesity and depression. Abuse includes sexual abuse, psychological abuse, physical abuse and "household dysfunction," such as growing up with a parent who was a ...spousebeater (Fort Myers News Press, 06/01/98)
80% of runaways come from homes where domestic violence occurs. (San Diego Domestic Violence Council, 1998).
In one study, 27% of domestic homicide victims were children. (Florida Governor's Task Force on Domestic and Sexual Violence, 1997).
Boys from homes with domestic violence are four times more likely to abuse in a dating relationship, 25 times more likely to commit rape as a child, 6 times more likely to commit violent acts against an adult partner or their own children. (San Diego Domestic Violence Council, 1998).